Reflections upon a life

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These are the days of long drawn out hours. The twilight zone of exile from my previous life, as wife, mother and homemaker.

Rendered redundant by the  sword thrust of divorce; after thirty seven years of marriage.

There is a new word for the latest trend; the Grey Divorce. It seems that more couples over the age of 60 get divorced than in previous years.

The Ex fell blindly in lust with another woman and impolitely got rid of me, divorced me within a year.

Overnight I was left entirely on my own in our home on a farm. He packed his stuff and left me with the two dogs. My adult children have their own lives with families and obligations. Family and friends looked on. They did what they could to support me. The reality was that by sudden divorce I was plummeted into life as a single woman.

He promised to “take care of me”. He has done so in his way. Since I am over sixty, he had to provide for my retirement.

Within a few months of negotiation and sessions with the Attorney the Consent Paper was drawn up and signed. Divorce by order of the Court was declared. I “got the House” we owned in town. I moved here to begin my much altered life as a Divorcee!

The first thing I did was hire builders to renovate the house. Then I rolled up my sleeves and planted a garden. I redistributed the existing plants into different beds. My gardening was an  inspired Act of Defiance. I employ a Garden service to help with the heavy landscaping work.

In the past  lived under the  control of my Ex.  One of his statements about me was, ” Dianne refuses to grow anything”

We have lived in Farm houses on beautiful farms all our married life. The gardens were huge and unruly. Unfortunately he expected me to work miracles with a spade and a trowel without regular help from a gardener. I gave up.

Now I have the freedom,  to plant, dig, acquire plants and flowers. I have created a heaven for myself and others where we may  enjoy,  play, dance, read, and contemplate.

I have time to be silent, to get to know myself,  pursue my passion, the Internal Martial Arts, Gyrotonics, to study and to watch the garden grow. and to heal.

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Tai Ji Granny

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Sensei Hans Menck  my Swimming Dragon Teacher from 2010. Photographed at @One Space 2011

Learn more: http://www.freedommartialart.co.za/about/hans-menck

In 2000 I met Hans through my friend Candice Jones, a Yoga Teacher. He is a Martial Artist. A handsome, vibrant  man with an aura of mystery around him. He immediately intrigued me.

Hans vibrated with passion for his life purpose; to perfect  Martial  Arts and become a Master. He began training from the age of nine. When I met him he had already traveled the world to train with renowned Martial Artists in Aikido, Kung Fu,  Tai Ji and other styles. Soon he was to leave to train with a Chinese Sensei in Australia, who worked as a construction worker in the day and taught his students after  hours.

I did not know then that when I met him years later in 2010 I would become his student and begin my training as a Tai Ji Granny at the age of 63! It would be the beginning of an interesting and meaningful life experience.IMG01050-20120429-1018

My life as a Tai Ji Granny.

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Hans Menck in Newlands Forest Cape Town 2012 where he regularily does Mountain Warrior  Martial Arts Training. He does regular solo retreats in the forest. 

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